December 8, 2008
Dear Daughters,
Last Sunday night our community choir sang its annual Christmas cantata here at Prosper Church. It was beautiful and I must admit it was fabulous to be able to sing in the choir. It’s the first time ever that I haven’t either directed or played the piano for a cantata and it was quite wonderful to simply sing. Having strong men’s voices behind me was such a treat – the men at Prosper Church really love to sing, and many can read music!
The most memorable aspect of the evening, though, was watching Marjon in the front row. She and Carl had been home for just 2 days after spending ten days in the University of Michigan hospital, and she was exhausted. Carl, of course, was unable to attend the cantata, but there was Marjon. On each side of her were two of their daughters, Carla and Alexandra on one, Erin and Maria the other. During one of the songs Marjon started weeping, which caused the daughters (and me) to weep as well. For a few minutes I wasn’t able to sing, I had to look away and pull myself together so I could finish the cantata.
What I have been reminded about this week is that marriage is not just about falling in love, but about commitment ~ keeping promises. Watching Carl and Marjon during these past weeks has really shown me what true love is. Marjon has cared for, fought and cried for her husband. When Dad and I went to visit Carl at home, he told us about his concern for Marjon and the emotional toll it had taken on her. It is simply amazing to see the love they have for each other. They are outspoken about their trust in God and look to Him for daily strength as well as asking for healing, but more importantly that God’s will be done in the whole situation.
This story is much bigger than just Carl and Marjon, it is affecting many other people in the area. All of our marriages touch countless people. You may not know it but others are watching you. If they see you struggling in your marriage yet continue to be faithful and work through difficult times, it often gives them hope and encouragement to keep on being faithful in their own marriage.
Faithfulness in any situation is a rare thing and a bright light in our world today. When a husband and wife keep their wedding promises for months, years, and decades – people take notice. Our society has made it far too easy to break promises, but when you stay faithful to your vows even though it’s not easy, it gives others hope. We’ll never know the impact of our actions until we reach Heaven, but I know God is smiling when He sees faithfulness.
A few years ago I was flying home from Idaho and sitting next to a single guy. We did the usual chit-chat and then he, noticing my wedding ring, asked how long I had been married. When I replied “35 years” he was quite amazed. Then came his next question “What two words would you say helped you stay in a marriage that long?” After thinking a bit I said “Forgiveness and Promises.”
In light of seeing Carl and Marjon and their family’s love and promises kept, I thank you all my precious daughters for the love you have shown to Dad and I. We pray for you and your families every day. Even though our marriage has been through some tough times, I’m so glad that we kept our promises to each other, because we are now reaping the rewards of commitment that we promised so many years ago.
Love, Mom
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