Dear Daughters,

As you probably know, all of you are part of or just preceding the Millennial generation.  Many of those Millennials have gotten a bad rap – having also become known as Generation Me.  Apparently, a large number of children born roughly between the years 1980 and 2000 have shown themselves to live with a sense of entitlement and possess narcissistic tendencies.

A few weeks ago I read a blog by one of my favorite authors, John Eldredge.  He titled the blog

Five Agreements That Are Killing Millennials

I would simply like to share his views with you because I think they are honest and an excellent assessment of not only many Millennials but are infiltrating our culture at large.

John defines the word agreement as:

Ideas which have secured a deep agreement in your heart without you really stopping to consider the implications.

Now, let me say right away that I think these agreements stretch far beyond the Millennials, and have permeated every age group in our country.  I know some in this generation who pay no attention to these ideas, but they are agreements which have particularly taken root during the 80’s and have extended far beyond those years.

Agreement #1: Doubt is one of the Highest Virtues

The Millennials have many beautiful qualities, one of them is having an openness to the views and opinions of others.  There has become a strong defiance against authoritarianism, and with good reason.

Almost daily we are inundated with yet another exposé of some previously respected public figure who has deceived the public for years, perhaps decades.  Because of the intensity and increase of these allegations/proofs of wrongdoing, suspicion has become a mode of survival.  Who do we trust anymore?  Surely not the government, the banks, the university professors, the entertainment industry, the political or even the religious leaders.

Because of this, a blanket of doubt has descended.  Public opinion teaches us that no one is honest, suspicion reigns supreme and we dare not trust anyone, including God.  Many believe  we have become a post-truth generation, meaning that everyone becomes their own truth.  Because there seems to be no absolute Truth anywhere, we are free to create our own.

Relativism has become a moral requisite for some Millennials.  After years of hearing people say they believe one thing publicly then behave another way behind closed doors, it becomes difficult to believe anybody or anything.  Words lose their meaning, people lose credibility, confusion reigns, and we are left to ourselves finding and often times becoming our own truth.

But it’s important to think about where this relativism will lead if we allow it to become a central theme in our life.  If we decide to trust no one, and make ourselves the judge of right and wrong, our life will slowly become adrift and meaningless.

Grandpa has an antique sextant displayed in the den.  He bought it in Pentwater while visiting us many years ago in Michigan. At the time I thought it was quite an odd thing to buy and it didn’t interest me in the least.  But lately I have been reading a little about the sextant which was first used around 1730.  It’s a marine navigational system – the first GPS system for sailors – to be aimed at fixed objects such as the Sun or the North Star and measured against the horizon, thus telling a sailor how to get where he wants to go.  As it determines latitude and longitude, it’s a sort of sea compass – helping a mariner arrive at his destination.

I have been out on the ocean a few times in my life and I’ve always wondered how the captain finds his way back home again in the midst of all the waves, water and wind.

A few days ago I came upon this anonymous quote:

He who is enslaved to the compass has the freedom of the seas.

If the captain of a ship had not trusted the sextant he may have stayed adrift on the ocean for years, floundering and hoping that perhaps someday he might float ashore and arrive safely at home – but could never be sure. With enslavement to his compass, however, he is able to stay on course and be sure of where he is going.  When a compass is used, there is freedom.

Last summer Dad and I took the Lake Express Ferry across Lake Michigan – from Muskegon to Milwaukee.  It’s a wonderfully relaxing way to avoid driving through Chicago traffic and still easily get on the I-94 to go back West.

Because the ferry takes off so gently and slowly at the beginning I couldn’t even tell we were moving.  There was another large barge floating nearby and looking at it I was unable to know if we or the barge were moving.  Finally, I decided to look at a house in the harbor – something I knew would be fixed – and then I was certain we were the ones moving.

That’s how it is with doubt.  If we continue to gaze at shifting ideas and beliefs that are here today and gone tomorrow, our lives become fearful, full of uncertainty and anxiety.

Jesus understands our grief and doubt when we have experienced lies from many people we have trusted.  But he doesn’t want us to stay there.

You remember Thomas (nicknamed Doubting Thomas)?  He didn’t believe his friends when they told him they had seen the resurrected Jesus.  Thomas stated emphatically that he would not believe until he was able to touch Jesus’ scars and see them with his own eyes.  When Jesus showed up a week later, He was patient with Thomas, encouraging him to touch his wounds and believe for himself. But he also left him with the challenge,

Stop doubting and believe.

Doubt and questions are good for a season, but to live in constant doubt and mistrust is to flounder in confusion as a ship without a compass.   If we abandon belief we will find that faith, hope and love erode as well.

Jesus has promised us that we can have hope in Him and His Word as an anchor for our soul. Anchors are solid, holding us to a fixed place of belief.   He doesn’t want us to live in constant confusion, riding on the waves of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind.

I have dark days when doubts come to harass me because of what I see in the world, and I have to fight to believe that God is good and He loves me.   But I am in good company with King David, when in many of the Psalms, he is angry with God, questioning how He runs the universe.  Lament and struggling with God is actually  worship – it’s believing that He is listening to us, no matter where we are emotionally.  If we honestly cry out with our frustrations and heart-wrenching pain, He is pleased.  He wants us to be honest with him because it’s then that He draws near to us.

How long O God, will you forget me forever? 

How long will you hide your face from me? 

How long must I wrestle with my thoughts, and everyday have sorrow in my heart? ….

Psalm 13:1-2

If we’re honest, we’ve all felt that way at times.  David continues on with more lament and anger, but later he says:

But I trust in your unfailing love; my heart rejoices in your salvation. 

I will sing to the Lord for he has been good to me.

Jesus encourages us to fight the good fight of faith because He is the same yesterday, today and forever and does not change like shifting shadows.  He is the anchor of our soul and our life depends on that fact.

Love, Mom