Branches and Trees

Musings on Marriage

Tag: Hands

Do You Love Your Hips?

August 1, 2017 / / 2 Comments

Dear Daughters,

Do you love your hips?  was the first sentence I read yesterday when I picked up Stasi Eldredge’s book, Becoming Myself.  I must say it stopped me in my tracks.

Actually, my hips have been growing larger over the last few years and I liked them better when I was younger.  But because Stasi asked this question about hips, I have been thinking about the marvelous body God has given me.

Now don’t get me wrong, my body is 62 years old, sagging and bagging in places I would rather it not sag and bag, but if I look at all my body is still capable of doing, I do marvel.

Stasi encourages us to thank God for every specific part of our bodies.  So, I began one day:

Thank you, God for my feet. 

They have taken me miles and miles in this life.   My feet have been obedient and true, going where I’ve directed them to go, and stopping when I have told them to stop.  They often get sweaty and stinky, but they have been faithful feet.

Thank you for my legs. 

They have carried my body through many states, hiking up mountains, running down sand dunes, walking down the aisle to marry your dad.  They have obeyed me and have gone wherever I have asked them to go.  My upper legs are much more jiggly than they used to be, but they still work.

I give thanks for my hands. 

When I remember all that my hands have done I stand amazed.  They have lifted food to my mouth so that I may be fed, and also to others’  that they too may be nourished.  My hands have created music, applauded countless times for other people, cheering them on, encouraging their efforts.  My hands have soothed you and dried your tears, my daughters, when you were sorrowing, hung on to and guided your two-wheelers when you were learning to ride, braided your hair.  These hands can still prepare a meal, cut veggies, make smoothies, point others in the right direction and give hugs.  Yes, the veins in my hands stick out and are looking gnarly these days, but they still work just fine.

I am grateful for my eyes. 

I can see the stars at night, the full moon in season, your smiles, your beautiful children, the words in a book, the stunning colors of the sunset.  Amazingly, I have recently learned to thank God for the bags under my eyes.  For years I have been embarrassed about them, but now I look at them and am reminded of how faithful the Lord has been to me throughout all the years of insomnia.

On and on I have begun to thank God for the miracle that I am.  You know, it’s funny, but we can live all day, going about our business, walking to and fro, and never once stop and realize the walking miracles that we all are.  It seems the only time we actually think too much about our bodies is when they are not working properly or when we think they don’t measure up to those around us.

Because you are fearfully and wonderfully made, there is no shame.  You are who God has created you to be.  Unique.  Beautiful.  Quirky.  Glorious.  One of a kind and celebrated.

Thank you, Lord for my heart.

It is interesting to think that the same God who created the mountains, lakes, forests and all the creatures that inhabit them,  created you – in His image.  He made us to be His reflection.  He made you with a heart to love, to feel pain and hurt but also to leap with immense joy.  He endowed you with a spirit that is much more beautiful than any part of our bodies.  Your spirit is the most important part of you, your body simply the temporary covering that is wasting away.

It is so tempting to look at others who seem to be more beautiful and play the comparison game – but as we all know it’s a dead end.  Enjoy and celebrate who God has made you to be, because there is no one else like you and He is singing over your life as you take this very breath.  (Zephaniah 3:17)

As Sam Levenson says so simply:

For beautiful eyes, look for the good in others;

For beautiful lips, speak only words of kindness;

And for poise, walk with the knowledge that you are never alone.

Thank God for your body, every part of it, and the specific beauty He has given you.  He knows you intimately – every flaw, every hurt, each joy of your heart –  yet loves you dearly.  You are noticed and known and loved.  As 1 John 4:10 says so simply:

This is love: not that we loved God,

but that He loved us and sent His Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins.

If God is for us, what does it matter that we do not fit the mold of the world’s beauty?  Give thanks for every cell (there are 15 trillion of them), every hair (about 5 million of those, yet I think our Blessed-with-hair family probably has more), and every blood vessel (around 100,00 miles of them) and stand in awe of how amazing our Creator is and how incredible is the fact that He specifically created you to be a part of this glorious world.

Love, Mom

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

May I Borrow Your Hands?

January 28, 2015 / / 0 Comments

Dear Daughters,

The other day Grandma came to me and asked if she could borrow my eyes for a little bit.  She was trying to figure out what to wear and because she is blind in one eye and has limited sight in the other, it is difficult for her to choose her clothes.  As you know, in her younger days she was always so stylish, matching purses and scarves, dressing just right.  I went into her bedroom and chose an outfit with some jewelry that matched and she gratefully accepted my assistance.

As I was walking back to my room I remembered a song by Joni Eareckson Tada from decades ago, on her album I’ve Got Wheels.  Joni is a quadriplegic, suffering from a diving accident when she was 17.  She sings the song to friends who are her caregivers.  The song May I Borrow Your Hands? goes like this:Clothes

 May I borrow your hands?  Mine don’t work so well,

But yours will do just fine.

May I borrow your hands?  Mine won’t work for me

Yours can be mine….for a time.

Helping one another, like a sister and a brother.

May I borrow your hands?  They can work for me,

Together we’ll do just fine.Hands

Throughout the day I found myself singing that song, inserting the word eyes for hands.  Later on I started thinking about things that Grandpa and Grandma borrow from each other.  At the age of 89 Grandpa’s eyes are still very sharp so he too is able to help Grandma with things that she cannot see.  He drives her into town for groceries and her Saturday morning hair appointment.  Grandpa has had essential tremors for decades – his hands shake always and his writing is impossible.  Yet Grandma is steady as a rock and still has a beautiful signature.

When it comes to walking Grandma is like an energizer bunny, she just keeps going and going and going….. whereas Grandpa has difficulty walking 100 feet.  Grandma’s “forgetter is getting better” but Grandpa’s mind is mostly intact.Hands (2)

I think most marriages are like that, where one is weak the other is strong.  God, in His infinite wisdom has put us with a husband who complements us in many ways.  You have heard that opposites attract and I know it is true in our marriage.

While driving around Dad is always interested in the geology of the area, wondering where the headwaters are to Billingsly Creek or at what point the Clam River flows into the Muskegon River, what river runs into which lake……  I on the other hand, just enjoy the beauty of what I see.  Dad loves to eat, and during one meal is always asking what the next meal is going to be.  I eat simply because I know I need to for survival.

When we go to visit museums Dad reads every single word on every single sign, while I am content simply browsing through and catching the highlights.  Family trees are his specialty and knowing all the kin, including second-cousins-once-removed are entertainment for him, but I get lost in the tangle of all the leaves, branches and twigs.Branches (2)

When I am weak, Dad is strong.

In spite of all our differences, we have learned to appreciate the other’s interests.  Throughout the years we have come to enjoy our various strengths and weaknesses, although years ago we often annoyed each other with our variances.  We are both able to admit our weaknesses more freely and ask for the other’s assistance when we need it.  In the beginning it tended to be more of a power struggle of who was the strongest in areas that were really of no importance.  I look back and see how foolish it was for us to live like that, but thankfully we have learned.

Although Joni Eareckson Tada wrote May I Borrow Your Hands? back in the 80’s when she was single, she and her husband Ken Tada now sing it to each other at the many events at which they are asked to speak about marriage.  It’s a vivid picture of what marriage is meant to be, allowing our husband to be strong when we are weak, and in turn being strong for him when he is weak.

Love, Mom

 

 

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