Musings on Marriage

Tag: Imagine

The Dash

Dear Daughters,

Today I played piano at the funeral of Gertie who lived to be 98 ½ years old.  I had only met her once – several years ago – but from what I gather she was full of life and love.  One of her granddaughters said she was like the energizer bunny, she just kept going and going and going…

Gertie lived from 1920 – 2018.  As the pastor mentioned, a lot of life happened in that dash between her birth year and her year of passing.  He spoke of her love for life, how she had for years given and given as she helped cared for her six younger siblings, eventually raising her own family.  The joy she brought to children, grandchildren, great-grandchildren, and even a few great-great grandchildren was obviously a large sum.

When four of the great-granddaughters spoke of their memories there were sniffles heard throughout the congregation, young men remembering her delicious homemade dinners, small children loving how she took time and care with each of them, friends musing about their hours together – memories of love and laughter.   Whenever someone would leave her home after visiting she would say,

Come again soon, don’t wait too long!

It’s good to go to funerals, to remember the brevity of our own lives.   It’s probably even a good idea to think of our own life backward: pondering what people might say at our funeral, then striving to live up to those images.

Gertie loved Jesus, and her life reflected that love as she continually cheered others on, encouraging the weak, playing games with the children – and always with a smile on her face.

As the slide show of Gertie’s life in pictures rolled on, the song I Can Only Imagine played in the background followed by Johnny Cash’s I Walk the Line. 

As I left the church my heart was full.  Even though I hadn’t known her, I loved her zest for life, her tenacity for joy, and I rejoiced that God created such a woman and that she, in turn, chose to be faithful and true, learning to live life to the fullest.  She was an outstanding giver, but in later years she learned to become a receiver.  Although she was still in exercise classes at the gym well into her 90’s, she eventually learned to receive help from others.

The first thing Danica said when she walked into the house this afternoon for her piano lesson was, “I’ve memorized part of I Can Only Imagine!”  She’s only had the song one week, but obviously loves it.  I mentioned that I heard it played at a funeral just that morning and she immediately repliedThat’s a great song for a funeral, but it’s a good song anytime.”  Indeed it is

We never know how long any of us have to live on this earth, but I long to fill my dash with giving well, graciously receiving, and living a life of joy.

Love, Mom

Now is your time of grief, but I will see you again and you will rejoice,

and no one will take away your joy.

John 16:22

 

One Year Later…

Dear Daughters,

We buried Grandma a year ago today.

Last December, the doorbell was ringing often.  Grandma lay near the end of her life, quiet, unresponsive and calm.  Hospice workers came in the front door along with gusts of snow and wind, coming to comfort us and Grandma, answering our questions and reminding us that death is not an emergency.

It seems so long ago that she was at the piano playing a myriad of tunes, many learned half-a -century earlier and still played by memory, even though she didn’t know my name or the fact that I was her daughter.  How I loved laying on the couch listening and simply being her audience of one.

The delicate sweet whistling we had listened to for years is gone, yet still strong and alive in my memory, show tunes, hymns, children’s songs…

Every time I set the table now, which used to be Grandma’s job, I see her in my mind as she painstakingly counted and sometimes recounted the four knives, four spoons, forks, napkins and plates.  She did her job well even when it was difficult, always wanting to do her part, willing to help just as a little child trying to please her mother.

I think about the heritage Grandma has left behind.  There are many memories of kindness, the giving of herself, of faithfulness and always remembering others. She never forgot a birthday or anniversary – until her mind started dimming.  She was continually giving value to the important days in others’ lives.

There were no decorations in the house last year because celebrating Christmas when Grandma was dying just didn’t seem right.  This year I decorated simply, finding some of her artwork from decades ago.

A group of us went with Grandpa to her gravesite today, remembering, mourning and then celebrating the many years of giving and living that those remembrances provide.

It would be easy to look at the gravestone and think she is gone from this life.  And in a way it’s true.  Yet it is important to look through her life, see all that Grandma has given to us, passed on to us – her children and grandchildren.  The gifts she has given are immense.  Yes, she has failed in many ways, just as we all have.  But she lived a life of gentleness, generosity, musicality and compassion, trusting in Jesus to safely bring her home.

Grandma, as well as all of us, live in a Story – a Story that started thousands of years ago, a Story that countless generations have passed through.  We are all a part of that Story – beginning from the garden in Eden to the great coming again of Jesus Christ.

We are not, as many people believe, simply repeating endlessly the cycle of birth and death, heading nowhere.  We have a heavenly home toward which we are hiking by faith, a path which millions of other pilgrims like ourselves have walked, giving us strength for today and bright hope for tomorrow.

I sometimes think it would be good for us, at times, to ponder our lives and wonder about our own eulogy –  what others will speak about us someday.  Will our life be remembered for our generous giving, for our kind words – or as a life full of complaining, bitterness and accumulating?

Grandma has been in heaven now for over a year.  I can only imagine what she has seen and experienced in that time, but I do know that it must be beyond my wildest dreams.

Let’s face it, our life here on earth is hard; it’s a battle against evil every day of our lives.  But if we look at the little blip of time we are here compared to the eons we will spend in eternity, it is only a quick moment, a blink of an eye.

Give thanks for those who have gone before us, yet keep your eyes on the glorious future that awaits you.

Love, Mom

© 2024 Branches and Trees

Theme by Anders NorenUp ↑