Musings on Marriage

Tag: Mold

Mold and Lies

I was pondering mold the other day – it and I do not have a good working relationship.  It’s a nasty fungus that grows in the dark and has been harboring in my body for years.  I am becoming quite the expert on mold, not by choice but by necessity.  Even though it’s been hiding inside of me for decades it has finally been brought out into the light and deposed. 

For years I have treated my body well, feeding it good nutritious food and vitamins yet I was always fatigued and could rarely sleep without medication.  I’ve been to countless doctors, both mainstream medical, homeopathic, osteopathic; I have tried naturopathic docs, chiropractors, acupuncture and sleep specialists.  Numerous times I would hear the phrase,

You are a most unusual case…

 Concurrently with all this I had prayed for myself, for wisdom in finding help.  I was prayed over by other people but nothing seemed to help my body regain energy.

Until… through a series of seemingly random events I discovered that my body was harboring molds – many strains of the toxic stuff:  Aflatoxin, Ochratoxin A, Gliotoxin along with many other nasty toxins.  Finding a doctor with the knowledge of removing mold from the body was a challenge yet I was led to a detoxification specialist living in the neighboring country of Canada, not far from my home in Michigan – Zoom calls are an amazing invention.

Then I got thinking about the similarities between the darkness of mold lurking in my body and the darkness of lies lurking in our minds – lies about ourselves, others and God.  Mold in our body and lies in our mind can often mimic each other.

Many lies are fed to us through unsuspecting people.  They come to us from our parents, our siblings, our enemies, our teachers and ourselves.  Some of them may be:

I’m too much to handle

I’m a loser

I’m not enough

I’m just a burden to my people

No one likes me (especially if they really know me)

God is disappointed in me

All I deserve are the crumbs and the leftovers

When those lies come to find a home in our mind, they play on repeat – over and over until they have carved a rut in our thoughts.  When the lies we believe become louder and louder, they can sap our energy because they make us feel like we are in captivity, sitting in prison with the door locked.  But, amazingly,  the door can be opened simply by replacing those lies with the truth of who God says you are.

I am chosen

I am a treasured possession

I am fearfully and wonderfully made

I am the apple of God’s eye

God loves me!

Even if I fall, God will raise me up again

I am redeemed

I am forgiven

If our self talk is anything less than what

Jesus says about us, we have misunderstood the Cross.

Rebecca Richardson

Lies we believe in our mind can be just as debilitating as mold in our bodies.  Ask me how I know, I’ve experienced both.  Many years ago I learned to detox my mind by believing who Christ says I am.  It was not an overnight renewal, but slowly and surely I was able to believe and live as if God really sees me as his treasured possession. Now – since I’ve discovered my body’s enemy – I am going through yet another detox. 

This detox takes time and patience – it is not instantaneous. I’ve been told it will take up to 18 months to clean out all those toxins. But my energy is back, I’m sleeping better than I have in years and I am able to walk and be off the couch, instead of the 4 to 5 hours a day I used to spend resting.

Thanks be to God for his amazing gift of healing on so many levels!   

 

Throwing Pottery

Dear Daughters,

I’ll be throwing pottery Friday if you want to come and watch, said the text from your cousin Charlene last week.

Throwing pottery?  I knew she was a potter, but had not heard that term before.  At any rate I decided to go and see her work as a novice.

So I went down to the potter’s house, and I saw him working at the wheel.  But the pot he was shaping from the clay was marred in his hands…….Jeremiah 18:3

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When I arrived she was working on a partially finished bowl and had just a few finishing touches before it would be ready for the kiln.  Upside down on the wheel, she carefully trimmed away some excess clay so the bowl would be just right.  She was careful, yet still some chunks broke loose and the beautifully crafted rim she had molded was marred.  Charlene simply chuckled and said,

Well, sometimes we think we are this, but then we are that.

She threw the broken chunks into a nearby 5-gallon blue bucket, not even lamenting about the change of plans, but remarked,

Nothing is wasted.  All the mistakes just go into this bucket and we use them for a later project.

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Immediately I thought about Romans 8:28 “…and we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose…”  How often have I mourned and become angry about things that have happened to me, how I have not embraced the pain, the grief and the hurt that have come.  I have simply wanted the agony to go away.  I could see no point except pain in what was happening, and who wants that?

But God, our perfect Potter, wastes nothing.  He saves the pain for a later project.  Sometimes we think we are one thing, but God has another plan, a better plan.  So a few chips get knocked off and He continues to do his good work.

Charlene used lots of different tools but her favorite was a little 89-cent sponge from the grocery store.  A simple tool, but so effective.  With it she could smooth the clay or make thin little lines all around the pot.  She spoke,

Any good tool has many purposes.

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Just think of all the tools God uses on you – your husband, your children, annoying workers at the office, rude neighbors and apartment dwellers, slow thinkers and movers.  Every one of them has a purpose, to help mold us to become more patient, kind, generous, less boastful, more humble – more like Jesus.

After the first pot was finished Charlene started another vase beginning with a single lump of clay.  She threw it on the blue plastic bat which was attached to the wheel head.  It didn’t stick the first time so she threw it again, adhering well.  But there it was on the edge of the bat.  Even I knew that this was not going to work.  So a few more times of throwing and it landed, with a little encouragement, exactly in the center.

Centering is everything.

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Yep, that sure sounds like real life.  If I don’t center myself on Jesus first thing in the morning, my day is not going to go well.  I will find myself more critical, impatient, and annoyed.  Just this morning I woke late, so jumped out of bed without even a word to Jesus and started my morning routine.  At breakfast I snapped at a comment Dad had made, which typically happens less than it used to.  Then I remembered, Oh yeah, I never asked for strength and help this morning, I just tried doing things in my own strength, which isn’t much these days.

As I watched that ugly lump of clay spin around on the potter’s wheel, it slowly took shape in the loving, wedging, nestling hands of Charlene.  Watching her hover around the lump of clay I could see her joy in her work, her love for the art, and her vision for what was going to appear.  Every now and again she would stop and center the lump a little better because it would tend to stray.  She said,

Do not let the clay tell you what to do; it will become a very naughty toddler. This pot seems to have an attitude so I’ll have to center it again.

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How often do I tell Jesus I don’t really like how my life is shaping up?  I sometimes give him some ideas which I think would be much better: If you could just make things easier, less invasive, more predictable, yada yada.  Really? I’m trying to tell the genius creator of the universe that I have a better plan?  Perhaps I need to work on centering myself so I become more submissive, more obedient, trusting and accepting of what comes my way, knowing that God’s ways are ultimately the best. Giving thanks for the difficult stuff.

The potter is the hero of the story.

She is the one who forms, shapes and creates beauty with a seemingly useless ugly lump of clay.  I think we (I know for sure I) want to be the hero and tend to put ourselves in a far too important role at times.  But we must keep in mind always that Jesus is the Hero, He is the creator and sustainer of all things.  Everything He does is good and will be used someday in His grand story.

I left that day before Charlene fired the pots in the kiln, however, I did learn that it heats up to 1800 degrees, and the pottery is cooked not once but twice.  Once after the shaping, another time after the glaze is applied.  I believe we as people go through the fire as well, our lives heat up almost beyond bearable, but at just the right time we are taken out and left to cool.  How else can we become strong and durable?  It certainly doesn’t happen when our life is sweet and cushy as marshmallows.

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Making pottery is a process, and I now understand why handmade pottery is expensive.  It gave me a whole new appreciation for the work Charlene does and the work, care and patience God has for me.  Let Him have His way with you, my dear daughters, and you too will become beautiful in the hands of the Potter.

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Love, Mom

 

 

 

 

 

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