Musings on Marriage

Tag: Peace

Peace in the Storm

As we were driving to the Upper Peninsula of Michigan, enjoying the summer-time greenery of the pastures, these lines from Psalm 23 came to mind.  They come from a poem written thousands of years ago by King David, probably remembering his younger days as a shepherd caring for his father’s sheep.

The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want

He makes me lie down in green pastures….

As you may remember, Jesus calls Himself the Good Shepherd, which means we are compared to sheep in a metaphorical sense.  Being equated to sheep is not necessarily a compliment because sheep are kinda stupid, they quickly stray, are dependent on others and easily frightened.

In order for sheep to lie down in peace they have need of a few important requirements.  The first one is freedom from fear.  Because sheep have a herd mentality, they are skittish and easily agitated.  If even a little jack-rabbit hops from behind a bush and one startled sheep runs in fright, it can cause the entire flock to bolt into a stampede –the rest not even looking to see what caused the ruckus. 

We too are easily carried away by fear if someone speaks terror or dread – whether it be true or false, real or imagined.  It’s so easy to run with the herd, getting caught up in a mob mentality, simply reacting to the running of those around us.

Life is hazardous, unpredictable; no one knows what fears and anxieties any moment will bring.  Usually it is the unexpected and unknown, or the fear of the unknown that throw us into a panic.  Often our first impulse is to run from the harsh complexities of life – just like the sheep.

But if we look up, we’ll see our Good Shepherd waiting for us to turn to Him, desiring that we rest and not run.  Admitting we cannot do life well on our own, he brings peace, calm and serenity – even in the midst of a terrible, horrible, no-good very bad day.

As I grow older, I am finally learning that no amount of worry, control or angst ever helped any problem I had.  It only caused fear and dread.  For years I tried to solve problems on my own, figure out and rely on my own wisdom, but rarely experienced the peace Jesus promised.

Why do we always think we can change people or control our circumstances?

Why is it so difficult to rest, to trust God to do his work in his time?

When will we ever give up and relinquish our ambitions to do God’s work for him?

Only when we choose to rest.

Another source of fear from which a shepherd delivers his sheep is rivalry, cruel competition and tension within the flock.  In the animal kingdom there is an established order of dominance, better known as a pecking order with chickens, a horning order with cattle, and a butting order among sheep. 

Usually a domineering, arrogant old ewe will be the boss of a flock.  She maintains her position by butting and driving other ewes or lambs away from the best grazing.  Then in turn they will use the same tactics of butting and shoving around those who are lower than they on the totem pole.

When there’s friction in the flock, the sheep cannot lie down in rest because they always have to be standing up to defend their rights and be on the lookout for safety.  They need to constantly be on alert, never able to let down their guard for fear of losing out on food and safety. 

But as past-shepherd Phillip Keller says,

one point that always interested me very much was that whenever I came into view and my presence attracted their attention, the sheep quickly forgot their foolish rivalries and stopped their fighting.  The shepherd’s presence made all the difference in their behavior.

Somehow, when the guy in charge, on a much higher status than those rude sheep, comes on the scene, they forget the silly scuffling and struggle for status and lie down.  Contentment and peace within the flock ensues. 

How much that scene sounds like us humans.  We try to appear as if we have it all together, put on that toothy smile and strike a confident pose, yet still we feel the need to prove ourselves – to others as well as to us.  But when we keep our eyes on our Good Shepherd, we know we are on even ground with everyone else, that without the grace of God we would be lost – a ship without a rudder, the proverbial hamster on a wheel going round and round yet arriving nowhere.

When my eyes are on my Master, they are not on those around me.

This is the place of peace, says Keller.

Jesus is so kind, so merciful to make us lie down in green pastures.  On our own we would never do it because we’re too busy doing stuff.  It’s only when we lie down and rest, trust him for tomorrow, and give thanks for what he is doing today, that we are content being in the silence of his presence. I have laid in green pastures more than I would like, but looking back I see it was only in this quiet, surrendered, helpless pose that He was able to get my attention on Him and off myself.

Lie down, look at your Shepherd and be at rest.

A Grateful Life

Dear Daughters,

After 94 years Grandpa’s chest is still, his heart no longer beating.  He was sleeping peacefully in his favorite chair, and then he was gone.  The struggle is over, he has met Jesus face to face.

During the previous few days the house has been full of people saying good-bye, recalling stories from the past, memories of his time shared with them, shouldering the pain and sadness of dying with us.  From laughter to tears, to hugs and handshakes, the days have been rich, beautiful, difficult and sad. 

Ginger, the Hospice nurse came and saw some of our family here to visit Grandpa and commented to him,

You are a lucky man to have so many people around you.

Immediately he said,

 I don’t believe in luck.

I am blessed.

He is blessed, we are blessed – by his generosity, kindness and humor.  Every day the nurse would come in and ask, how are you doing, Lou?  And every day, as long as he could speak he would say, I’m great.

This evening it is silent, painfully quiet.  No more breathing treatments, the oxygen machine is still.  Willow, Grandpa’s faithful dog sits quietly beside his friend’s chair wondering what has happened.

A few weeks ago I gave Grandpa a bell he could ring if he needed me.  The bell had a beautiful tone, deep and rich.   The first few times he rang it I felt like coming in the room standing straight and tall saying – just like Lurch from The Addams Family – You rrrang?  But I didn’t, I just asked what he needed. 

He never asked for much, help to get up, a glass of water, reminding me he was ready to go to sleep.

A few mornings ago he woke up agitated, wanting to get out of his bed, yet knowing he was unable to walk anymore we couldn’t let him.  So I started singing hymns to him.  Because of his lifetime of singing plus the tradition of singing a hymn every night after dinner with Dad and I, he knew many of them by memory and started whispering a few of the words as I sang. 

Amazing Grace

In the Garden

The Old Rugged Cross

Great Is Thy Faithfulness

He relaxed, laid back to rest and grew calm.  My mouth got dry but I kept on singing. 

Yesterday morning he was agitated again so Aunt Rhonda and I decided to sing You Are My Sunshine.  Surprisingly, we remembered all three verses so sang with gusto, being quite pleased with ourselves.  But as we were nearing the end of the song Grandpa remarked with a wave of his hand, OK, that’s enough sunshine.  What works one day doesn’t always work the next…

Thank you.  Those precious words were the most consistent and common words I heard from Grandpa.  He was so pleased to be able to die in his own home, surrounded by those he loved and was grateful for all the care he received.  Jolene, Judy, Merilee, Ione, Dotty – all friends and helpers faithfully coming to help for days, months, some for years, have become part of our family. 

From the moment we are born, we are in the process of dying.  We don’t often think about life that way but it’s true.  Some of us live a full life, others don’t.  But we all can make the choice to live our one life well, because even though our bodies are wasting away, our Creator Jesus renews our spirits day by day.

Love, Mom

CS Lewis on the Virus

Dear Daughters,

One of my favorite writers, C.S. Lewis (author of The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe), wrote an interesting few paragraphs 72 years ago. Even though his essay was written in light of the recently-dropped atomic bomb back in 1945, it is still relevant today. All we need to do is replace the words “atomic bomb” with “Coronavirus.”

I do believe all necessary precautions should be set in place and taken seriously, yet, we are still able to live in peace and not fear.

Fear and anxiety are more contagious than any virus.

John Eldredge

Below are Lewis’ wonderfully wise three paragraphs:

On Living in an Atomic Age (1948) by C.S. Lewis

In one way we think a great deal too much about the atomic bomb. “How are we to live in an atomic age?” I am tempted to reply: “Why, as you would have lived in the sixteenth century when the plague visited London almost every year, or as you would have lived in a Viking age when raiders from Scandinavia might land and cut your throat any night; or indeed, as you are already living in an age of cancer, an age of syphilis, an age of paralysis, an age of air raids, an age of railway accidents, an age of motor accidents.”

In other words, do not let us begin by exaggerating the novelty of our situation. Believe me, dear sir or madam, you and all whom you love were already sentenced to death before the atomic bomb was invented: and quite a high percentage of us were going to die in unpleasant ways. We had, indeed, one very great advantage over our ancestors – anesthetics; but we have that still. It is perfectly ridiculous to go about whimpering and drawing long faces because the scientists have added one more chance of painful and premature death to a world already bristled with such chances and in which death itself was not a chance at all, but a certainty.

This is the first point to be made: and the first action to be taken is to pull ourselves together. If we are all going to be destroyed by an atomic bomb, let that bomb when it comes find us doing sensible and human things – praying, working, teaching, reading, listening to music, bathing the children, playing tennis, chatting to our friends over a pint and a game of darts – not huddled together like frightened sheep and thinking about bombs. They may break our bodies (a microbe can do that) but they need not dominate our minds.

God is still the same today as He has been throughout eternity. The Coronavirus did not take Him by surprise, and it is only through Him that we are able to have peace in the midst of chaos and panic. God is still good, and Jesus comforts us with His own words:

Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled, and do not be afraid. John 14:27

I pray for you as you stand strong in hope and peace.

Love, Mom

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